I can be your superman.

"Actions speak louder than words"

Wrong.

Mostly.

I think the adage is overused, or misused. If you're talking about "practicing what you preach", then I suppose it applies. In other words, words are useless if you don't put them into effect. However, I think many more times the opposite is true. I think the cliche has become an excuse for thousands and thousands of people that are too afraid to talk to the ones they love... myself included.

The real power lies in words that provoke action. Actions and words together may very well be a superpower. Every day people use casual words and very rarely in a context that matters. People avoid the conversations they should be having and hope their actions speak loudly enough for others to hear. Sadly, the reality is that in general the words the actions aren't conveying haven't even been spoken in the right place or at the right time. If I'm not being clear, I'm not talking about people you spend every waking moment with. I'm talking about those relationships you have with your friends and extended family. The ones where you always feel like you could probably make a difference in their lives but you never actually do.

Tonight as I was driving home I had one of my cousins on my mind. She may read this, it doesn't matter. She's apparently having some relationship issues. So I was thinking to myself, "What would happen if I got his phone number and called him. I don't even know anything about the situation, but I bet I could call him and tell him that he should call her right now. He should tell her it's stupid for them to be fighting. If he loves her, he should tell her he loves her, and finally he should either apologize if it's his fault or if it was her fault he should just lie and say it's his fault and then apologize anyway." I don't know, he may have felt obligated to fill me in on what actually happened, and that may have forced me to modify my persuasion tactics, but I'm confident that I could have talked him in to calling her. What's the problem with my plan? The problem is that it's one of those things you would never actually do. Why? I suppose because it's not socially normal or because you're afraid you'll be wrong.

Or maybe you never do those things because everyone can't be a superhero. Using words to provoke action is a superpower, after all. It seems like a simple one. But perhaps Clark Kent wonders why we don't all just jump up in the air and start flying. I'm sure it seems simple to him.

I'm practicing.

Maybe I didn't save my cousin's relationship (I think it will work out anyway) but I am honing my superpowers with my niece and nephews. I've been making an effort to have more serious talks with them. Instead of just losing sleep over worrying about them, or hoping they mimic the actions I rarely get to display, I'm taking action and using words. Words that inspire action. For example, I recently informed them that "Okay" is a magical word. Dear God I hope my words inspired action. I hope, at least once, when their Mom tells them to go clean their room they stop and think "Let me try that magical word Uncle Scott suggested". I hope they say "Okay", and I hope they are magically rewarded.

I doubt I'll ever perfect my superpower to the point of being able to save the world, although I honestly believe some have, but I'll be happy if I can simply make someone I love a better person.


[A quick aside]

I realize this goes nicely with one of my previous blogs "Hero Complex". I may struggle a bit with pride, but I promise I'm not as arrogant as these blogs would indicate. When trying to think of a title for this blog for some reason the song Superman by Luna Halo popped into my head. The chorus repeats "I can't be your superman".